Meet Anne Thomas.
So, I was in NYC this week and a taxi driver asked my why I was so freakishly pale and pasty looking. Â So I said to him, “drive me to nearest tanning salon. Â And step on it.”
I went to Portofino Tanning in SOHO.
I walk in and was greeted by the pretty young girl behind the counter. Â She asked me how many tanning sessions I would like to buy. Â To which I replied, “two thousand tans, please.”
I gave her my credit card, and my name and info popped up on the screen (thanks, George Bush). Â And she said, “oh my god, Albany! Â I just got back from Albany! I love that place. Â We had so much fun. Â I, like, want to move there.”
and I was like, Â ”That’s crazy! why were you in Albany?”
and she said, “I was in a show at Capital Rep.”
and I was like, “What show?
and she was like, ‘Man of the La Mancha“. Â (And I thought, “I wonder why it isn’t Man de la Mancha.”)
And then Anne was like, “I love Albany. Â Everyone was so friendly and we had such a good time. Â We were out on Pearl Street all the time. Â You guys have the best restaurants.”
And then I was like, I wonder if she went to any of my restaurants while she was in Albany, so I asked, “did you happen to go to place called Bombers? Â It’s on Lark Street?”
and she was like, “LOVE Bombers”. Â (and I thought “thank you god.”)
and then I asked, “did you go the Biergarten.” Â and she was like, “LOVE the biergarten.”
and I said, “did you go to The Olde English? Â it’s an English Pub? ” and she was like, “Nooooo, we wanted to but we didn’t make it there. Â (and I thought, “yeah, but you were there for like 3 months. I mean c’mon Anne.”
So I told her I owned those places, and I patiently waited for her to say, “that’s so crazy. Â You now have free tanning for the rest of your life!” Â but she didn’t. Â She continued to be a normal, good employee, sweetheart and continued to say complimentary things about our great city of Albany… and then charged me full price.
Nevertheless, I love it when people visit Albany and have a great time.