A martini is a terrible thing to waste.

Titties n’ beer.

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Aug 22, 2011 17 Comments

I was trying to enjoy my weekend, when I got the following text message from a friend of mine who was having drinks down at the Biergarten….

Over the weekend, someone hacked into our computer system and changed our Wireless Network Name from “Wolff’s Biergarten” to “Titties ‘N Beer”.

I then proceeded to become a crazy person and I called Mark the manager at the biergarten to confirm if it was true (it was), I called Time Warner Cable, my friend who works for Time Warner cable, the Apple Store to see if they knew how to change it back, and then lastly, I called 911.

( I didn’t call 911.  but I wanted to.)

I also had about 20 people visiting me for the weekend when I got the text, I was like “Oh my god, listen to this.  Someone changed the wireless network at the biergarten to “Titties n’ Beer”.  Can you f.ing believe that?!

And almost everyone was like, “that’s funny.”

and I was like, “no it is not. It’s offensive.”

And they were like, “it’s pretty funny.”

I think it would be funny if it was the name of a strip bar.  But even then, I think it would be a pretty uncreative name.  (For example, when I was working for GE Nuclear in Wilmington, North Carolina, my boss used to take us to this topless strip bar called “Nothing Butt”.  I always thought that was a clever name.)

Anyway, I had Mark turn off the wireless network until we can figure out how to change it back to “Wolff’s Biergarten”.  I apologize if anyone was down at the biergarten over the weekend, saw that network name, and thought we chose it.

Lesson learned:  Secure the network.

 

 



Comments

  • kathy
    Aug 22, 2011 at 7:34 am

    there is a place in south jersey called jugs and mugs

  • Jeff
    Aug 22, 2011 at 9:33 am

    That network name sounds fitting for the Thatcher St. Pub

  • GOOSE GOOSE GOOSE
    Aug 22, 2011 at 9:58 am

    The name of my WN is ‘Can I Just Put The Tip In?’

    hahaha

    If you’re ever within range and want to log in, my password is, ‘PeopleGetPregnantFromTheTip’ – and yes, it’s case-sensitive.

  • BD
    Aug 22, 2011 at 10:46 am

    email sent.

  • Matt
    Aug 22, 2011 at 11:33 am

    changing it back is easy………..

  • Jackers
    Aug 22, 2011 at 11:34 am

    across the river in Rensselaer is a place called Miss Kitty’s Beer and Titties…neither selection is very good there though.

  • erik
    Aug 22, 2011 at 11:34 am

    I always wanted to open a laundry with a liquor licence and call it “Liquor Clean.”

  • Slacker
    Aug 22, 2011 at 11:43 am

    That’s pretty funny. Sorry.

  • GOOSE GOOSE GOOSE
    Aug 22, 2011 at 1:02 pm

    Erik, please do.

  • Rian
    Aug 22, 2011 at 1:33 pm

    A Munson comment would make this worth reading.

    @Goose, still not funny. Your jokes are not funny. Be creative

  • Justin
    Aug 22, 2011 at 1:45 pm

    I don’t think it is offensive, but it is false advertising :-)

    “Foot-Long Sausages ‘N Beer” would have been funnier.

  • DB
    Aug 22, 2011 at 2:38 pm

    I can account for my where abouts. (passed out drunk from Spaten Oktoberfest on the side of Broadway)

  • Julia
    Aug 22, 2011 at 8:21 pm

    I’m holding my beer in between my tits right now ;)

  • Jen
    Aug 22, 2011 at 9:23 pm

    That’s hysterical, but sad. There was an ACTUAL sober person at the Beirgarten who was obviously looking for some action, he never got. I can only assume he was sober, since he spelled titties right. Congrats on being smart and pathetic at the same time. We laugh at you!

  • Chris D.
    Aug 23, 2011 at 9:54 am

    That is very funny and I think anyone looking a wireless device would have laughed out loud if that popped up while having a cold one!

  • Casey
    Aug 23, 2011 at 1:21 pm

    Aw Matt, I would have changed it back for you in a minute. I am surprised you don’t have some tech-savvy friend, but I will be it.

  • Kate
    Aug 23, 2011 at 4:28 pm

    If you are going to go to the trouble of hacking into the system, at least be more creative with the name.

    OK, I will admit I laughed when I first read it, though I would have gone
    ape sh%t crazy if someone had done that to my business. Italian (Sicilian) with a hot temper, I would have hunted them down (or had some of my uncles do it)…

    I hope the people visiting you over the weekend were there to welcome Frank – hope he is adjusting well.

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