A martini is a terrible thing to waste.

7 things I learned at Free Burrito Day.

By

Apr 21, 2011 32 Comments

1.) I am not as young as I think I am.  After standing for 6 hours at the register processing all the burrito orders, my back felt like I just carried a keg up Mount Marcy.  (that’s the really tall mountain up north, right?  Or am I confusing it with some porn film from the 80s?)

2.) I should probably change the name from “Free Burrito Day” to “Not Everything You See In The Store is Free… Day”.   It shouldn’t have been so confusing, but about 4 thousand times I was forced to have this conversation,  ”where do we get the drinks?”   says the customer.  ”I have a cup right here for you.  They’re 2 dollars, would you like one?”  ”they’re not free?”  ”No they’re not.”  ”but I just donated outside”.

And I wanted to say the following but didn’t, “get out of my face before I get all NeNe Leakes on you.  Now get.”

3.) I should have faxed a memo to every office building in Albany that read, “We apologize, but no, you can not call in an order for 175 free burritos for everyone in your office, and then have one person come and pick them up.”

4.) Last year I did not let you get free wings instead.  I have worked the counter every year for 14 years on Free Burrito Day and I have a memory like a very gay, very drunk elephant, so don’t play with me.

5.) A lot of people order food the same way they would order at Taco Bell.   It caused a lot of confusion at times because a “Bean and Cheese” burrito is just that… “beans and cheese.”  So when you order a bean and cheese burrito, but then complain you didn’t get the rice and salsa and lettuce and tomatoes (and sometimes the “hamburg”, it makes me a little frustrated.  However, I learned my lesson early on and started having each Taco Bell type person (yes, I said it) list specifically what they want in their burrito.

6.) I managed to catch a pretty significant contact high while working because lots of you enjoy doing bong hits before eating your free burritos.  Evidently, doing the bong hit just seconds before walking in the door.  Bless your little hearts.

7.) I learned that we gave away about 4,000 free burritos and made about $3,000.   So, although it doesn’t prove to be the biggest fundraiser we threw, it all adds up.   If you couldn’t make Free Burrito Day but would like to donate online to our Leukemia & Lymphoma fundraiser, please click here.

Lastly, thank you to the staff at Bombers Lark & Schenectady who did an amazing job pumping out all those burritos, and with a smile on their face.  (probably because they were all high as a kite. ha, you know what Im’ sayin.   just kidding, NYS Labor Board.)

 



Comments

  • Ryan
    Apr 21, 2011 at 1:14 pm

    I remember having to work Free Burrito Day and all of the insanely dumb questions that they would ask. Makes me smile in retrospect.

  • Parma Ham
    Apr 21, 2011 at 1:43 pm

    People are gross, they will try to abuse everything. Can you imagine calling in for multiple free burritos that you want to come and pick up or expect other things for free in the store? Or complain about your free burrito? The fact that the people who came in to pick up 4,000 burritos averaged $.75 in donation per burrito is sad.

    Gross people.

  • Sean
    Apr 21, 2011 at 1:49 pm

    I’ve never paid so much (happily) for a burrito. This is one of my favorite fundraisers in town. I’m just a little disappointed thaty the LLS didn’t at least realize a $1 for each burrito. Nonetheless, thanks Matt for giving us this each year.

  • Kevin
    Apr 21, 2011 at 1:53 pm

    Thanks for the free Burrito, Matt. I also enjoyed the Jimbo I bought to go w/ it. I brought my co-workers down from MVP. We wanted the change of scenery and passed on ‘phoning it in…’ LOL.

  • Tammy P
    Apr 21, 2011 at 2:04 pm

    I wasn’t able to make it yesterday. If I had, however, I would have gladly made a donation and taken the free burrito as offered and not expected anything more. It’s a fundraiser, people!

  • Tammy
    Apr 21, 2011 at 2:21 pm

    Wow, I can’t believe that you only earned $3,000 for 4,000 burritos…how cheap can people be, especially when it’s going to charity!! I would’ve hoped everyone would give at least $5/burrito.

  • Ginny
    Apr 21, 2011 at 2:24 pm

    I’m sort of disappointed in the peeps. I figured most people would at least donate half the price of a burrito. $1 Burrito Day next time??

  • peter
    Apr 21, 2011 at 2:49 pm

    You do a very cool thing for a lot of people and why would people think you get anything else instead of a burrito on free Burrito day…anyway thanks

  • Helen
    Apr 21, 2011 at 2:58 pm

    I went at about 3:35 yesterday and was out of there in less than 10 minutes and that includes the walk to/from my car a few blocks away.

    I think it took me longer to get a free ice cream cone at Ben & Jerrry’s a few weeks ago.

    Thanks for the Free Burrito :)

  • dgc
    Apr 21, 2011 at 3:33 pm

    Maybe next year you just offer the Chicken, the Ground Beef, and Vegetarian burritos just as they are written on the menu. It will make it easier on your staff, and you won’t have to deal with the “Taco Bell” people. *shrug* It’s free… you can’t be too picky if it’s free.

    Just a suggestion. : )

  • bugman
    Apr 21, 2011 at 3:50 pm

    I just donated. $1.33/burrito made me weep. wtf.

  • D-Dub
    Apr 21, 2011 at 4:16 pm

    It never ceases to amaze me how people will abuse free offers. Take the free bean and cheese burrito and SCRAM!

    Bravo Matt!

  • Flurries
    Apr 21, 2011 at 4:31 pm

    “with a small (what?) on their face.” A penis? Are you STILL high? You’re welcome.

  • wowie
    Apr 21, 2011 at 5:13 pm

    A small what on their face????

  • ALB
    Apr 21, 2011 at 6:56 pm

    2 things I learned yesterday:
    1. You are a hardworking, generous business man and I am sorry that people were not as generous as they should have been (I was, but that’s how I roll). I was there at 10:55 and my burrito was delish. I’m glad I introduced myself, although I felt a little like a FP fangirl.
    2. Craig is hooooooot. With his accent, grey t-shirt and nice smile sold me on getting more raffle tickets than I expected. Wise move putting him on the raffle ticket sales! I hope he has fun while he’s in town!
    Allison

  • kingsolomon2010
    Apr 21, 2011 at 8:22 pm

    Thanks for the free buritto, Matt.
    Thanks for making the entire transaction take less than 60 seconds.
    Thanks for putting up with the cheap mickey-fickeys since I love free buritto day.
    And thanks for puttin Craig out front. Do you think you could get Audrina Patridge next year?

  • Parma Ham
    Apr 21, 2011 at 9:41 pm

    Bombers Burritos are $8.00, makes it really sad that donations were $.75 per burrito. Matt you would have raised more for charity if you just donated the full proceeds of every regular priced burrito to charity for a day? Thats 375 burritos and it would have cost you a hell of a lot less.

  • Flurries
    Apr 21, 2011 at 10:24 pm

    There were burritos?!! I guess I’m a selective reader..
    As for your #1 point: Doesn’t it feel great when you stop hurting yourself?

  • Ashlee
    Apr 21, 2011 at 10:45 pm

    I donated to the charity online through your link and didn’t get a burrito so that has to make up for at least 2 cheapo douches.

  • Edna
    Apr 22, 2011 at 3:01 am

    If you promote it as FREE then what do you expect? You got a donation,thats what you asked for, thats what you got.

  • Matt
    Apr 22, 2011 at 3:20 am

    @ Edna, if we advertised FREE BITBURGERS at the Biergarten, and you showed up for a free beer and saw that there was also a leukemia fundraiser taking place, I guarantee you would give a dollar or two towards to the fundraiser. Right? I guess I expect more people to be like you.

  • Hopeful
    Apr 22, 2011 at 8:06 am

    I love you, Matt!!

  • Simba
    Apr 22, 2011 at 8:22 am

    Thanks for donating to the LLS Matt! I’ve fundraised w/them before, they are a great group of people, I wish there were more people out there like you!!!
    Next time we have to get you to run the marathon while fundraising :)

  • juli
    Apr 22, 2011 at 9:19 am

    Yeah, I didn’t make it out yesterday (Passover) but I’ve been to things like this and always just donated what I would have paid normally. I am really sad to hear how little people donated. Sorry, Matt!

  • Edna
    Apr 22, 2011 at 10:45 am

    I’m sorry for being so cynical.I’m old and have seen so much “bad” behavior by people that my opinion may be skewed.As always,I thank you for what you do for our community.As far as FREE Bitburger,yup,I’m in!

  • Erin
    Apr 22, 2011 at 11:08 am

    I went to Schenectady Bombers at around 3:30 on free burrito day. Not only was the entire staff completely helpful and efficient, but I couldn’t believe how happy they all seemed after slinging that many burritos to an apparently stingy crowd (maybe they were happy because it was almost over?)

    Anyway, kudos to you and your staff on giving back to the community. A few more business owners on local, national, and world levels should take a page from your business practices. The world would be better off.

  • erik
    Apr 22, 2011 at 1:17 pm

    I just donated online as well – no free burrito necessary, but if I had taken one I def would not have been a “cheapo douche bag!”

  • Jacky
    Apr 22, 2011 at 2:43 pm

    For my best friends birthday we went upstairs and ordered a full lunch (for the free margarita). The line downstairs was whoadiculous! when i tried to cut through the line of burrito salivating dollar donators to go up the stairs… i was told by three girls that i was “cutting”…. and they wouldn’t move! they did not care what i said, they wanted their burrito! finally a kind kid told them to relax and that i really was just going upstairs, not trying to steal their lunch. people are crazy.

    I loved x a lot my fish tacos(my favorite thing on the menu these days) however, our waitress was not entirely friendly, social or … participatory knowlegeable about our order ha! if you can’t remember the order, PLEASE WRITE IT DOWN .. oh well, was a crazy day for everyone there for sure…

  • Tim
    Apr 22, 2011 at 4:30 pm

    First, thanks for doing this. It’s a big hearted gesture from a well-loved local business. Second, as a world class apologist, I’m sorry that people can be lame. Third, I wish I lived closer to either Bomber’s location so that I could have A) participated and B) checked to see if my grandmother was ordering a burrito. Hamburg?? That had me laughing right out loud.

  • Jessica
    Apr 24, 2011 at 12:00 pm

    Wow, I must agree with most people who’ve commented …. people are cheap! And crazy. I can’t imagine leaving less than $5. I didn’t stop in because I don’t love being around free loaders .. but it was a very generous idea. I hope people who cheaped out are reading this, and if this event happens again next year, I really hope you make more. Less than $1/burrito is ridic!!

  • JohnE
    Apr 28, 2011 at 12:48 pm

    I’m also a little surprised at the average donation being on 75 cents. I would think most people would give at least a buck. I gave $1.50 (after scrounging under the couch cushions for spare change and I really wish I had more to donate). But to say that people should give $5 for a “free” burrito is kind of ridiculous. If I had the cash I would have given what I thought a Bombers burrito is worth- maybe $3? maybe $3.50 at the most?

  • Goose
    Apr 28, 2011 at 2:16 pm

    I donated but didn’t get a burrito…unfortunately, the ranchero sauce, buffalo chicken, rasta blue cheese burrito doesn’t exist yet.

    The nerve.

Leave a Reply